Hello, Lord…

I guess you’ve noticed I’ve kind of been in hiding for the last couple of days, telling myself I didn’t have enough time to talk to You. I’ve used all very good reasons–feeling a little overwhelmed with the demands of motherhood, nursing a nasty cold, etc. But You know the truth, don’t You? You always do. I’ve been in one of those funks where I wonder why You could possibly want to hear from someone as selfish and whiny as I am. I’ve felt too grungy in my own sin to sit down with You, and instead of coming clean, I just wallow. And so I feel more grungy, then more distant, then still more grungy, and on goes the cycle. And for just a tiny second, the enemy wins.

But thank you, thank you for that still, small voice that reminds me that You chose me, for some strange reason, and that you have a beautiful way of using cracked pots in Your kingdom. Thank you for calling me back to the table and listening to my sheepish confessions. Thank you for letting me just sit there, and rest, and get my bearings again. One of these days, maybe I’ll stop being surprised that you can forgive me, again and again, often for the same things. But in the meantime, I am surprised, and relieved, and so very, very grateful.


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