This Is How You Know You’ve Been Blogging Too Long

Hobby Lobby is my second favorite store in all the land.  (Yes, I said second favorite–details of the first favorite are coming to a blog post near you very soon.)

I love everything about this store–the sales are amazing, and oh great day all the crafty gear makes me instantly want to weave potholders the minute I walk into the door.  They are probably running a craft-lovers racket, and I am the Chief Sucker.  My budget has taken a battering over the years, because, "Look!  It’s decoupage glue for 50% off!  And what if I need decoupage glue in the next decade?" 

See?  Chief Sucker. 

Yesterday Corrie and I went to Hobby Lobby to buy some end-of-year teacher gifts.  Now, here is where I should tell you that as much as I love their store, their grocery carts are horrible.  Nearly every one I’ve ever used has been top-heavy and wobbly.  There was one incident years ago in which my then-one-year-old son ended up hanging upside down by his pants, and I can assure you it was entirely the cart’s fault.  My preoccupation with the 50%-off florist ribbon had nothing to do with it.

We walked in, got a deathtrap cart, and Corrie asked if she could stand on the end of it.  I said no, because I am a safety-conscious woman who watches Dateline NBC.  I turned my back for 2.8 seconds to get a sales flyer (because I needed to know what entirely useful craft supplies were 50% off this week).  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a flash of metal and my daughter crashing toward the floor.

In slow motion, I turned to my right to see that Corrie, ever obedient, had not climbed up on the end of the basket, she had climbed onto the side of it.  The whole thing was in the process of falling down on top of her. 

And I, in that instant, wanting to redeem myself for the son-hanging-upside-down-from-his-pants incident, inserted my leg between my falling daughter and the falling cart. 

She is safe.  My leg, however, is not. 

It hurt SO badly that it took every bit of self-control I had not to sit down in the floor of the store and weep.  But I couldn’t, because they might think I was one of those crazy lawsuit people, and what if they flagged me as a troublemaker and wouldn’t let me buy 50% off scalloped scissors anymore? 

I managed to hold myself together, though I was gritting my teeth and fighting back tears.  I even finished my shopping trip.  (That is courage, y’all.  Courage.)  I came home and nursed my wounds.

But the point of this entire story (believe it or not, there is one) is that a few minutes ago I took a picture of my battered leg so I could blog about it–truly, there are some glorious bruises–when I realized in the nick of time that oh dear Lord, I nearly posted a picture of my thigh on the internet. 

I think I need a new hobby. 

73 thoughts on “This Is How You Know You’ve Been Blogging Too Long

  1. Muddy says:

    A visit to Hobby Lobby might help you find that new hobby, but then again, you might have a repeat of same incident and life would repeat itself once more. It could become a vicious circle.
    Funny how when things happen to us now as bloggers we analyze it to see if it is “blog worthy”. (and funny to discover, most of it is!)

  2. Debs says:

    Oooh, sounds nasty. Hope it recovers soon. After 3 months in TX and several visits to Hobby Lobby I can understand your obsession drive.

  3. Debs says:

    Yay! I wasn’t sure if that (using the strike) would work, and I was just hoping I hadn’t messed up your comments for the rest of the day.

  4. JanMary, N Ireland says:

    We don’t have such wondrous stores as Hobby Lobby here – should my bank balance and thighs be grateful?
    Hmmmm…I think it is a risk I am willing to take, if they ever care to extend their empire.

  5. karen says:

    Bless your heart. I remember when my daughter flipped my son over in the cart and how mortified I was that people actually saw! (mother of the year material here.)
    We all survived.
    And I think the manager was terrified that we might sue.
    Even though it might have been our fault. I’m not sure. Because my back was turned and I missed the whole thing.
    I hope your thigh is better soon.

  6. jean says:

    I don’t have a Hobby Lobby near me. But I can appreciate your love of the 50% off!! And I’m sorry about your leg. However, in the interest of full disclosure, I think you should put the picture up. LOL. Feel better.

  7. Brandy says:

    Just to make you feel better, I’ll share a Wal-Mart shopping cart story. I was shopping in a crowded story around Christmastime, when I decided to stand on the bar at the front of the (empty) cart. A cart that flipped over on top of me. And put me inside a Wal-Mart cart cage.
    It was traumatic.

  8. Momandmore says:

    Okay Shannon. That’s hilarious. I’m sorry to laugh while you’re injured but it just so totally sounds like something I would do. Minus the heroism that is. I would just somehow hurt my leg doing nothing. Maybe just walking. And believe me I have! Lots of times.
    I too love Hobby Lobby and the creative inspirations but I have to ask you: does it not drive you absolutely nuts that TO THIS DAY THEY DO NOT USE BARCODES? Returning stuff is such a pain! Sorry to dis your second favorite store.
    Hope you’re leg is well soon! Glad there were no broken bones.

  9. Carol ~ I Throw Like A Girl says:

    That was truly a “mom” thing to do – sacrifice your own leg for your daughter. I have a feeling though, that if you did sit on the floor and cry in Hobby Lobby, they might have given you some coupons out of pity. Try it next time. 🙂

  10. Barb @ A Chelsea Morning says:

    I know it wasn’t funny. And I know I shouldn’t admit this. I’m laughing my head off. Imagine posting a photo of your thigh, for the whole bloggy world to see! OK, your thigh might be OK, but I can assure you, if I posted a photo of mine, well someone somewhere would probably figure out a way to completely annihilate my blog.

  11. Melanie says:

    I thought you were going to tell me that you yelled,”I have a blog, people! I am so going to put you on it!”
    We go a little nuts when it comes to our kids’ safety.
    You could have put the thigh photo in your profile. That would freak people out.

  12. Superchikk says:

    I love Hobby Lobby. I get their weekly flyer via email each week and try to find a reason to go. My Mother decided I should be in charge of my sister’s “Miss Rodeo” scrapbook, and as I have never before made a scrapbook, I find myself standing in the paper aisle, glazed look in my eyes, drool falling from my chin. But it’s 50% off!
    I totally know what you mean about thinking of everything in context of your blog. I even have people ask me if I’m going to blog something, because they want to read about it, even though they are experiencing the real thing. Crazy.

  13. Amy loves Bud says:

    I just realized my own embarrassing photo moment, that I actually did publish to the world on WMFW not once, but again twice on your best-of WMFW.
    I am humiliated, but feel a bit dishonest taking it down.
    Anyhow, I hope you feel better. Take comfort in knowing that only a Real Mommy would have done what you did!

  14. Gettysburg Mom says:

    I too have a similar story…It was a different mega-craft store, but an equally wobbly cart. I turned to look at stickers and suddenly heard both children yelping. My then five year old son had stepped onto the back of the cart. His weight and my two year old’s weight combined was enough to flip the cart backwards onto him. He was trapped under the cart with his sister suspended above him by the seatbelt. I saw no sympathy- only accusation- in the other shoppers’ eyes that day. I’m incredibly reassured there are other mothers out there with shopping cart histories…

  15. Ashleigh (Heart and Home) says:

    Oh goodness–I’m cracking up, not at your poor leg, of course, but at the fact that I am apparently not the only blogger who has nearly posted things that should NOT be aired to the internet. Ah, that good ol’ blog-fog!

  16. Amber says:

    Thank you for making me LAUGH! What a delightful story! I burned my stomach with a curling iron (I was dropping and decided to catch it between my arm and stomach…)and was glad that I did not post the pic then either! 🙂

  17. chilihead says:

    ROFLMAO! Even *I* have never seen your thigh and you almost posted it to the whole bloggy world? Oh, girl! You are far gone, indeed.

  18. Chris says:

    Oh. My. Word.
    I don’t think there’s space enough on the Whole World Wide Interweb to show a picture of MY thigh.
    Besides, it’s just an ugly thought to begin with.
    On a brighter note, however….The Girl has just started working at Hobby Lobby here, and I can get 15% off of anything in the store! WooooooHoooooo!!!!

  19. kelli says:

    “oh dear Lord, I nearly a picture of my thigh on the internet.”
    Oh. My. Word.
    I needed that laugh.
    But I sincerely hop it gets better really fast!

  20. dcrmom says:

    SNORT. Yes, we are a rare breed, aren’t we? (I still can’t believe I shared the epipen incident with the world. Blog fodder – it’s worth all kinds of embarrassment.

  21. dcrmom says:

    That’s the parenthesis that I left off of my last comment. I wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight if I didn’t correct that.

  22. Tami says:

    I absolutely love Hobby Lobby but hate the carts too. Just 1 week ago my 1 one year was hanging upside down from the inside of the cart. I caught her before she fell. Thank God! Because if she had hit that floor head first it would have been awful.

  23. Marian says:

    BUT! You could blog AND get a workout. Look at what my husband just showed me:

    The only workout I’ll ever get from that is an ab set from laughing hard, but it’s good to know such quality options are out there. =)
    (Hope your leg feels better soon.)

  24. suburbancorrespondent says:

    I can top that, believe it or not. Many years ago, I let my 4-year-old son ride on the end. So his 2-year-old sister cried that she wanted to stand up also and I put her on the side. I thought I was being safe because this grocery store used those removable seatbelts for their carts, and I had buckled the kids “in,” as it were, to the end and side of the cart. (Am I describing this right?)
    Anyway, the cart went over as you described on top of my little toddler, who of course was screaming like crazy. And I couldn’t lift it up because of the weight of my son belted in on the end. And I couldn’t snap the belt off because…well, I don’t know why, exactly, but it wouldn’t come off. So he was screaming too. And some kind-hearted gentleman righted the cart so I could unbuckle my 2 screaming children, while an older woman commented, “What a stupid thing to do!”
    I felt like such a dope, and a horrible mother to boot. I went home and cried. The kids were all right, though. And they never asked to ride that way again.

  25. jessica says:

    i used to go to school in Indiana, where i frequented Hobby Lobby. That is a fabulous store! Then i moved back to MN and am stuck with only Michael’s. Sigh.
    i hope your leg feels better!

  26. Kim says:

    Too funny – your thigh in all its glory!
    Amber – were you primping naked again? Didn’t I warn you about that already?!

  27. Christie says:

    A sign of a great post is one that makes you laugh out loud when you’re in a room BY YOURSELF! Praise the Lord I wasn’t at the library! Thank you for that much needed dose of laughter!

  28. Deanna says:

    Oh my gosh! I have the same story only it was a Michael’s cart. (and also their assorment of decopauge glue and ribbons I will someday find a use for) Oh and none of my 3 kids seems to remember what happened the last time we were there and so we have to repeat the whole thing every time, with every child. I stopped stopping the cart a long time ago, I mean hey, they will learn someday, right?? right??

  29. TRS says:

    and what if they flagged me as a troublemaker and wouldn’t let me buy 50% off scalloped scissors anymore?
    Funniest line EVER!!

  30. momrn2 says:

    Oh OW! I’m thankful your daughter is safe and pray your wounds heal quickly!!
    As to having second thoughts about photos to post… I too have been there once or twice.

  31. Christy says:

    Ah. I miss Hobby Lobby. We don’t have one nearby. I’m not even sure where I am going to do my Christmas shopping this year!

  32. Connie says:

    I love this story…sorry to miss seeing your bruises…but I’m so glad you realized it before you posted those pics rather than after!

  33. Amber (Proverbs31) says:

    Great punchline! I’m so glad she’s safe.
    I was in a Hobby Lobby I think, with my mom and my three children when the one inside the stroller got his arm pinched when my mom sat his seat up and the one sitting on top of the stroller handle bar (yeah, I know, I know) went crashing to the floor backwards as my mom yanked up the one in the seat to comfort him- who up until that moment had been serving as a counterweight for the one on top. So there we are standing in the middle of hobby lobby, both of us holding a screaming child and wondering just how many people are staring at us and thinking “Well THAT wasn’t smart.”

  34. Howdy says:

    Hope you heal up quickly.
    Hhmmm – I would have had to shave my legs before considering posting a picture… LOL because it’s only early April and I’m still a long way from shorts season here.

  35. Julie says:

    Interesting. We have had a Hobby Lobby cart tip over on us too. With 1 year old Parker strapped in and 3 year old Brooks pinned underneath the cart. It was real fun trying to get the cart up off of Brooks while Parker was strapped in. Both crying hysterically.
    Sorry about your leg!

  36. Erica (A Yankee In Jawja) says:

    Sorry, I couldn’t help it. 😦 I totally visualized said scenario. I feel your pain and your OCD for 50% off ANYTHING in Hobby Lobby.
    I walk thru the automatic door and sigh a big sigh. My stepdaughter looks over at me and says, “Happy now?” Yes, yes I am.
    I don’t think we have the same carts at our Hobby Lobby because ours are tiny. I mean 1/2 as wide as a normal cart and 1/3 the size in length. I can barely buckle in my purse. Seriously. And ours are big, plastic blue ones. I may have to take a picture when I venture that way this weekend.

  37. sara m. says:

    I’ve found that a good way to prevent the cart from tipping over (if anyone is ignoring Dateline NBC & riding on the sides anyway) is to have one kid on each side of the cart. It balances it out well. If you have more than 2 kids – just keep adding them to the sides in EVEN numbers. Just keep it balanced, you know.

  38. Julieann says:

    HA-Ha—I can sooo relate–I turned my ankle on a rock in my yard–and it turned such a lovely shade of purple, that I too, took a picture of it to post on my blog…LOL.
    Hope your leg feels better soon.

  39. Shalee says:

    Wait a minute, Shannon. I seem to recall my posting a picture of my very skinned-up knee after a morning spill. It was a WFMW even… The least you could do is bare all as well. 🙂 (Hope the thigh feels better.)

  40. Minnesotamom says:

    HAHAHAHA! I don’t know if I’ve been blogging long enough to make that mistake. My thigh? Might as well post nudie pictures.
    That said, what a brave mama you are to:
    1. Stick your leg out
    2. Bring your daughter into a store like that at all–so many things to get into!

  41. Beth/Mom2TwoVikings says:

    Had a similar incident when trying to get Pojke off the piano bench to go down for a nap. Picked him up, he curled his legs under to resist, and as I pulled him back towards me, the bench began to fall…onto my bare foot standing on a hardwood floor.
    As he is kicking to show his displeasure about going to nap, I watched the bench in slow-motion falling and it seemed like I had several moments to consider the possibly of either dropping him in self-preservation to catch the bench OR takin’ it like a mom.
    I chose the latter and spent nearly two weeks with the grossest black, blue, yellow, and every other color of the rainbow bruise on the top of my foot.

  42. NerdMom says:

    I am with Suzanne that crafting isn’t for wimps and you have proven it;). I am in one of the horrible west coasts states and have never seen a real Hobby Lobby. I have heard so many nice things about them. We have Michaels and they have stinky carts too.

  43. Melissa says:

    okay…first off, I think it is to be said that I can no longer read your blog while at work. I started laughing out loud and in a deathly quiet office, well let’s just say people noticed. LOL
    I’m so excited that we are getting a Hobby Lobby (close by) sometime this year. My husband…not so thrilled.

  44. ScatteredMom says:

    I’m glad you’re okay, sorta.
    When we were on vacation in Arizona two summers ago, Jake was swimming at a hotel pool when he cut his foot on something in it. It was not a big deal, but the hotel made a giant fuss over it.
    Jake then piped up and said something about that maybe it was a NEEDLE.
    The poor hotel employee just about passed out from fright.
    *for the record, it was only Jake being dramatic.

  45. Marcy says:

    So, you have a ‘shopping’ injury? I wanna see your husbands face when you explain that one!
    I now live in California (from Chicago)- and to my great sadness…NO HOBBY LOBBY. Oh I can still remember all the lovely frames, baskets, fake flowers PLUS all the craft supplies. Man I loved that place. Nothing like it even comes close here…..

  46. Jolanthe says:

    LOL – my husband couldn’t believe it (and frankly I’m still amazed) that I posted a picture of the bottom of my legs after having laser hair removal done.
    It wasn’t pretty. 🙂

  47. Ginny says:

    Oh no you poor thing! I got a terrible burn on my left thigh when we went to see the Selfridge air show the summer before. I did the same thing, I almost posted a pic & thought what am I nuts. Too funny! Hope your leg feels better that had to have hurt. I also love how you said no to the end & your kid did the side. Kids are so smart aren’t they, lol.

  48. Hislifeformine says:

    “oh dear Lord, I nearly posted a picture of my thigh on the internet”
    ROFLOL We feel so free and life family that it just seemed natural to show them bruises didn’t it?

  49. April says:

    My sister sent me a link to this post and told me to make sure to read to the end. Why? Because I recently posted telling pictures of a leg waxing experience I had with my younger sister. And I posted pictures of my hairy leg. Like month plus hairy leg. 😐

  50. Heather says:

    I was laughing so hard at this! My husband who is usually annoyed when I consistently want to read him things, laughed really hard. Enjoyed the post!!

  51. Heidi says:

    I could give you a run for your money as Chief Sucker. And we have Hobby Lobby, Michael’s, and Jo-Ann’s! (I’m not sure if that’s gloating or not.)

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